Friday, November 16, 2007

Misery Loves Company

Why is it the when someone is about to achieve something that people thought was impossible to achieve we need to knock them down and make it twice has hard for them to attain that goal? Why is it that when someone is miserable we are happy and when they are happy and successful we need to find something that could potentially bring them down?

It’s the old adage “Misery Loves Company”. When we see some one who is achieving something we wish we could do we tend to demean them or down play the feat. Take for instance Barry Bonds. He is the single season home run leader and now the all time home run leader. Did you know he is also the record holder for the most walks plus at one point he stole the most bases in one season? In a few short years A-Rod will be approaching some records especially the home run record. I will guarantee you that we will find something wrong with him and what he is about to accomplish. (Maybe we will blame his nose hairs for being to long and it gave him an advantage in some way).

My son even gets grief from his friends. “Oh, you’re just fast because of your father.” No it is because he tries and practices and doesn’t quit. We want to be around successful people but when they achieve that level of accomplishment we are the first to shoot them down. Here is why I think we do it, we are jealous and wish we could accomplish that same feat.

If we as a nation uplifted each other and held ourselves and our friends and neighbors to a higher standard we could be so much further in this society. On 911 New York could have pointed the blame on so many things. Did they? No! New York said that they had a job to do and that everyone needed to come together to get it done. In the end it was done. I was there when it happened and I remembered looking at the debris that was all over the place. The defaced American Express building and the buildings around where the twin towers once stood and I said to myself, “ Boy it is going to be a miracle if we could get this cleaned up in my lifetime” Well two short years later you would never be able to tell of the devastation that accord. New York band together, held each others hands and because of that did not lose a beat.

New Orleans on the other hand, after the devastation of the floods began to look for excuses and point blame on why this happened. They looked for handouts (aid) and expected people to help them in their unprepared state. They began to point blame instead of coming together and lifting each other up. To this day their land is not completely fixed and they are still pointing blame.

We do this in our fitness lives. We see someone who you believe looks better then you and we automatically say that they are on some illegal drug. Forget about the hard work they may have gone thru to get to where they are today. We see women who are in there 40’s and 50’s that look 20 years younger and we say that they had some sort of surgery. How about looking for and praising that person for being the way they are? No, that won’t work. Why, because inwardly we are jealous of that person for being better, doing better or looking better then we could ever be.

So keep it up America and one day we will look back and see all the success we could have had but didn’t because of our attitude towards our brothers and sisters.

Monday, September 10, 2007

Excuses, Excuses, Excuses

“Well, if it weren’t for the fact that I have some physical problems I would be able to do…..”.
“I am just not gifted enough to be athletic”
“I am too fat to do …..”
“I can’t do …… because it’s too hard.”
“I just don’t feel up to it today….”
“Only certain people are gifted enough to do this. I was not brought up that way so I can’t ……. So I am not going to try and do it”
“Kevin, you have been doing this your whole life. You are not the norm. That is why it comes so easy for you”

First things first. Let’s define the word excuse. According to Webster the word excuse means:
· To make apology for
· To try to remove blame from
· To grant exemption or release

Think about it guys, most of our excuses are lame. I was watching a movie the other day and there was a line in this movie that really explains how I feel about life and excuses. Let me set it up for you.

Here was this old guy getting ready to live his dream. Everyone said to him that he would not be able to achieve it. His trainer said that he was too slow. He had arthritis in his knees so he could not do much running. He was 30 pounds overweight so his conditioning was not what it used to be. He had very little money so he could not get the best trainers to help him.

On the other hand, his opponent was much younger, much quicker, much stronger, and had much more endurance then he ever had. Finally, he also had the best trainers that money could buy.

He looks at his friend/trainer and says, “So let’s make every punch count.” His trainer said that he wanted him to be so strong that when he hit him his “ancestors” would feel it. They began a workout regimen that was very intense but something he could handle with his conditions.

At one point his son went to his place of business to try and talk him out of this ridiculous thing. He turned to his son and said, “All we have is our self and our dignity. Life is hard and it will hit you as hard as it can. What makes a person, though, is not want they have or accumulated but when life hits you hard and you fall, you always get up. Because as soon as you get up the first time it will hit you again and again. What makes your character is as hard as life hits you, you get up and keep going. Keep striving for that goal, that dream, even when they tell you that you can’t do it. Don’t let anyone tell you or stop you from achieving your dreams. That is all we have and should try to achieve. At least at the end of my day I can say I dreamed, I tried and I succeeded.”

I have a sign on my wall that talks about winners and losers. It says the following:

· The Winner is always part of the answer
· The Loser is always part of the problem
· The Winner always has a program
· The Loser always has an excuse
· The Winner says “Let me do it for you”
· The Loser says “That is not my job”
· The Winner sees an answer for each problem
· The Loser sees two or three sand traps near every green
· The Winner says “it may be difficult but it’s possible”
· The Loser says “ It may be possible but it’s too difficult

Are you a Winner or a Loser? Every excuse you use does not put you in the winner’s category but the loser’s category.
I had a member come in the other day and I gave her a workout to do. The last thing that I wanted her to do was two-minute abs. She said to me that since she was a child she could never do crunches the way I wanted then done. Her words to me were “I CAN’T DO THESE, I HAVE TRIED”. My response to her was “now that you have tried, when you are done with your workout let’s go and do it”. I told her that if it is in her heart to do something and she gives it her all and is determined to achieve it she will do it. Well, on her second try “SHE DID THEM!” She walked out of here with tears in her eyes and I think finally got a clue.

Guys, it is now January, stop the excuses and get it done.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Teachers are they really the blame

After reading some letters about athletics and achedemics and having many conversations with parents and teachers, and being on numerous school boards, I just need to put my two cents in. In my years of either playing or coaching sports, and having sat in many offices and have heard many things about our children and have been asked my opinion on numerous topics, most teachers do hold our children to a higher standard.
Here lies the problem in my estimations of it, we all want winning teams. We all want automatic winners. When we don’t get what we want we need someone to blame. Why not blame the Athletic Director or the Principle, it is their fault that our kids are not prepared. It is their fault that our kids are not conditioned well enough to stay in the game. It is their fault that our children (little Johnny or sue) are a step slower on the field and in life then their competitors. It is their fault that the night before a big game or big test our kids were out until all hours of the night with their friends. I believe that to be unfair and they should not be the scapegoat for a system that is going to take time to get back to its winning ways.
We are all the blame. We never hold our children to a higher standard when it comes to sports or academics. I believe that when we reach the high school level, our children need to already have learned what it will take to become winners and not whiners. I believe that if we want to have a winning system, it starts at home. We need to hold our kids to a much higher standard and not accept average or middle of the road. Whether it be in academics or sports arena we need to raise the bar and then keep it there! Here is a little secret I want to share with you. If you want that sports teams to become winners, you need to start at least 1 year before that sport begins. Don’t think that just showing up the day of tryouts and then competing on the field 2 or 3 weeks later is going to get you to where you would like to be. If you all gave 1 year of dedication, the results would be amazing.
Don’t blame the coaches or teachers, they are only working with what we are giving them and in some cases, we are not giving them much. You want to be competitive in Track and Field, start working out now for next year. You want to be competitive in Football start training now for next season. You want to be competitive in soccer, start training now for next season. Training does not start 3 weeks before your first game. You should be thinking and talking strategy not getting in shapeat that time! If you did this, the coaches and teachers would love you. It would make their jobs much easier and much less stressful. I know that as a coach it really unnerves me when I have an athlete come to me with hopes and dreams of making it in Track and then going to the first meet and getting his head handed to him. Give me that child for a year of hard intense training and I’ll give you a winner.
Just the other day as I was leaving for Tennessee (taking my son to the Junior Olympics). I was getting gas at the gas station and noticed to kids no older then 12 years old coming out of the store with food in their hands. That wouldn’t be so bad, if it weren’t 2am! What were they doing out? I don’t want to know. Where were their parents? Now when they get into high school and they fail, whose fault will that be then?
We don’t need to point blame but come along side and help. Together we can achieve miracles. Divided we can achieve nothing.

Friday, August 3, 2007

It’s OK to be Second

“You can’t win all the time.” “ Just let them have fun.” “Let’s not ruin it for the kids”. “Billy doesn’t look happy, let’s let him win.” “Why try, I’m going to lose anyway.” “What’s the point in practice, I can do this with my eyes closed.” I can go on and on but let’s just spend a few minutes on this topic.

In a nutshell, this is what is wrong with America’s youth today. We are not challenging them enough to see them succeed in whatever endeavor they take part. We, as their parents, are settling for just making Johnny happy and not helping him go the extra mile to achieve even beyond what you can be imagined for him.

I am faced with this dilemma. I have three children and as their father I know what each one is capable of doing, whether it is in sports or academics. I know that if we, as parents, settle for just finishing or just getting good grades then that is all we are going to get.

Don’t you want to see your children exceed even further then you? How about being in the top ten in their high school class? Or being the best athlete on the field in whatever sport they are in? Or being both respected by their peers and showing respect for their peers in everything they do? Do you think these aspirations can be achieved by just getting by? I don’t think so.

We all have busy schedules. I work 15 hours a day, but always find time to spend with my children. It is draining most of the time but the benefit for doing this is priceless when their teachers tell me that they wish they had more kids like mine in their class, or coaches say they are needed on the field because they are one of the best athletes out there.

Our kids look to us for guidance. They have no clue what it is to succeed until we tell them that they can and them help them achieve their goals. Let’s not settle for just putting them in front of PS2 or the TV. Get them up, point out their strengths and help them find something that they like (outside of doing nothing) and then make them winners. Don’t let them settle for second place!

Friday, July 6, 2007

Life is short, Live every moment

I have heard from so many people that life is short and that we should live it to its fullest. I have heard from those same people that we never know how long we have to live so live everyday like it’s your last. I truly believe that we are to live each day to its fullest, but I also believe that we should not be foolish about it.

One of the most important things to us is our health and without that we truly have nothing. Obesity has skyrocketed which has caused high blood pressure, diabetes, knee problems (including replacements), high cholesterol, lower back issues, impotency, infidelity, divorce, and so many other things that it has surpassed what we would consider an alarming rates and is now almost becoming the norm for some families.

Guys, settling for the above paragraph is not even settling for second best, it is giving up altogether. Here is the problem as I see it. We as Americans want everything and with everything there is a consequence, good or bad. We now consider gluttony a contest and call those people who partake athletes (i.e. hot dog eating contest or brat eating contests). How stupid is that?! We look at our physical problems and blame the other guy instead of taking the responsibility for our stupidity.

The question here is this, what has gotten you to this point where, as I saw the other day, you are even afraid to get out of your car let alone your house because of your appearance? Don’t blame your parents or your friends but blame yourself for the decisions that you made up to this point. Now, with that understanding, what do you need to do to change? This is where the work comes in, and the answer is changing your lifestyle habits.

Here at Parker’s Place and on we give people every opportunity to succeed in changing their lifestyles. It is really up to you to do it. We will give you cardio workouts and weight training workouts as well as someone to talk to about your issues. We will do whatever it takes to help you change your life style. Look at your situation and ask yourself, is it conducive to me changing my habits or not. You see, once you begin to change your lifestyle habits, YOU WILL BECOME HEALTHIER. Yes, they all go hand in hand.

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

calories are to the body what money is to us

Calories are to the body
What money is to us.

Over the past two years I have had a lot of people come to me and ask me what they need to do to lose weight. I have had a lot of people come to me and ask me how is it that I can stay so thin. Or why is it that so n so doesn’t workout as much or as hard as I do and they can be so thin.

Look at it this way. Lets say you wanted a job and I employed you. I told you that I would pay you but I never specified when or how much. After a months time you finally get a paycheck from me. What would you do with that money? Wouldn’t you take those funds and save as much as you possibly could and every pay check after that wouldn’t you do the same with the fair that you may not see another check for a while. The answer to that is yes.

We have a metabolism system that regulates how we use the calories we receive on a daily basis. The busier we are the more our metabolism speeds up to get us the energy we need to survive. Now lets say that on some days you eat breakfast and some days you don’t. Some days you have lunch and breakfast and some days just lunch and still some days you have all three meal including snacks and some days you have nothing at all.

Your body has no idea what is happening so what do you think it is going to do but store as much as it possibly can with the understanding that whatever meal you last had could be the last one for a while. This is how we gain weight and lose energy.

Now lets say I tell you when you are going to get paid and in what amount and on what day. Doesn’t that make you feel a little better and gives you the ability to spend as much as you need when you need it. So you don’t have to worry and your life is a little less stressed.

Your body is the same way, if you start regulating your meals and having them everyday at approximately the same time everyday and in reasonable quantities, your bodies metabolism will not panic but use the energy you are giving it daily. By doing this, this will give you more energy, you will feel better about your self and get this, you may even lose weight.Try it, and just remember calories are to the body what money is to us.